What you keep, you lose. What you give away, you keep.
--A Lakota saying
In earlier days, generosity guaranteed the survival of the family, the band and the tribe. When hunters came back, they shared food with everyone. Today, when your relatives come to visit, they may stay for days. Everyone is fed, clothed, given a place to sleep.
Material things have no value in themselves, only the value we give them. Real wealth for a Lakota is not money or things, but relatives--their Tiyospaye. The more relatives you have, the wealthier you are. The dominant culture measures wealth in money and they think we are "poor." They don't know about our values, so they don't understand how rich we all are. In the Tiyospaye, generosity means sharing not just material things but also giving emotional support, such as compassion and empathy.The giveaway is an example of Lakota generosity. It is held to celebrate a significant event. Sometimes a gift is chosen for a particular person. Other times, gifts are just laid out and people halp themselves, so there is no control over who gets what. The most "valuable" gifts are those given withhout expecting anything in return. What you give is also important. Giving what you cannot replace is a higher form of giving. It demonstrates the transient value of things and possessions. My mother was a very generous person. When someone came to visit, she gave them the best food she had. If they admired something in the house, she would give it to them. If they didn't say anything, then she would bring out some of her beautiful embroidery, and if they admired that, she would give it to them. The Sun Dance is the highest form of generosity. Dancers give their flesh, their bodies -- the only thing they really own. Through their suffering comes new life and new knowledge for the People. They offer of themselves to bring back a sacred way of living. Generosity can also have negative results, as when a parent gives money to a child and the child buys alcohol. The opposite of generosity is stinginess or selfishness, hoarding or taking more than you need.